It is best to take turns with the hard parts of caregiving. We see that in nature. When the lead goose gets tired he rotates back and another goose flies point. The other geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up their speed. An encouraging word goes a long way.

There are times in the life of a caregiver when you feel especially vulnerable. These times have been identified in the 'Educated Caregiver Series' as:

•       Early Stages of Care­

        giving

•       Changes in your health

•      Changes in the health

        of the care receiver

•       Stressful Situations

'When you are feeling vulnerable you can alleviate this feeling by making an appointment with the doctor social worker or family to discuss what is happening, what the options are and how they can help.

•      Make a list of the ques­tions that are bothering you.

•       Make a list of your ob‑

        servations about the

              situation that is causing
              stress.
 

"God is our refuge

and strength, a very

present help in

trouble. Therefore,

we will not fear,

though the earth

should change,

though

the mountains shake

in the heart of the

sea." Psalm 46:1‑2

As a caregiver you can give the gift of dignity to your care receiver simply by communicating your respect through conversation. Be honest in ail your conversations.

These tips will help you foster a caregiver/care receiver relationship that is healthy for both.

1. Always talk to the care receiver with the respect you would show the adults you work with. Even where dementia is evident there are always windows of understanding.
    

2.  Encourage them to discuss or ask questions concerning their last health care appointment, test, etc.
    

3. Discuss current events

with the care receiver. Ask what they think about them, This helps you both to feel connected to the outside world.

4. Don't talk above or around the care receiver but talk to them. Include them in all conversations especially those that concern their situation or health.
    

5. Control your voice. The tone and volume of your voice often speaks louder than the words that are spoken.
    

6. Explain what you are doing and why, either before or while you are doing it. This will foster trust between you and the care receiver.
    

7. Leave as many day to

day choices to the care
receiver as they are

capable of making.

Such as: "'What would
you like to eat, wear,

do, watch on TV, etc."

8. Encourage them to express
   their feelings and emotions.
   This requires listening on your part.
    

9. Tell them you appreciate
   what they contribute to
   your world both past and
   present.
    

10. Encourage the care receiver
    to share their memories.
     

11. Ask their opinion, learn from
    their life experiences.
     

12. Read to each other out loud
    and then discuss what you
    have read to stimulate conversation.